3 Keys To Attracting Women
October 28th, 2008
What are the 3 Keys to Incredible Success in every interaction?
1. Keeping it Fun
2. Escalation
3. (It’s a secret!)
Watch the video to learn how to apply these secrets to double or triple your success attracting women 
Cheers, SolaceTo recieve more amazing content like this every day Subscribe to our Newsletter for free Instantly. Every day you’ll recieve heaps of amazing content you won’t find anywhere else. Click here to Subscribe Now.
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Why Women Date Bad Boys And Marry Nice Guys
October 22nd, 2008
This is a dual posting between Hot Alpha Female and I, You can find her video at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKLwtQ3T3c4.
You can read her full post on her blog at: http://hotalphafemale.blogspot.com/2008/10/five-minute-find-woman-wednesdays-why.html
Enjoy, SolaceTo recieve more amazing content like this every day Subscribe to our Newsletter for free Instantly. Every day you’ll recieve heaps of amazing content you won’t find anywhere else. Click here to Subscribe Now.
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Why Pickup Lines Don’t Work
October 13th, 2008
Welcome to my first ever video
Pickup lines are both the saviour and the bane of many men, promising quick instant results with little effort. Unfortunately there is a down side to them in that they can improve your game… momentarily, but keep you stuck in a rut that is hard to get out of.
Enjoy the video and if you have any questions you’d like me to answer, feel free to contact me through the contact form and I’ll do up a video to answer your question and help you out.To recieve more amazing content like this every day Subscribe to our Newsletter for free Instantly. Every day you’ll recieve heaps of amazing content you won’t find anywhere else. Click here to Subscribe Now.
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The Most Awesome Book Ever
October 11th, 2008
If you’re lazy and don’t feel like reading the whole of 100 words below (seriously I’d do the same, you don’t want to listen to my dribble), you can grab the book at: http://www.sinnsofattraction.com/ (It’s free BTW)
Wow! Seriously I’ve read a LOT of ebooks in the past few years and tell you what: 95% of them are either
a. Junk
b. Rehashes of generic information
c. Make no sense AT ALL
But guess what? I’ve found it, the holy grail of ebooks! (lol no seriously, I’m not even being dramatic here)
Sinn Just released his Game Acceleration Doctarine and it is PHENOMENAL! (and free!)
This is the guy that teaches THE GURU’S and takes their game to the next level, and he most certainly knows his stuff, in fact I love his blog so much I even linked to it in http://www.letsinspire.net/blog/2008/best-of-the-best-pickup-resources/
Anyway enough blabbering you can download the book at: http://www.sinnsofattraction.com/
Once you’ve read it, come back here and post your thoughts. I’d love to know if it answered any questions you’ve been having or if there are area’s you’d like more help with.
Enjoy it!
– SolaceTo recieve more amazing content like this every day Subscribe to our Newsletter for free Instantly. Every day you’ll recieve heaps of amazing content you won’t find anywhere else. Click here to Subscribe Now.
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What Would You Do If ‘The Community’ Did Not Exist
October 5th, 2008
Thought provoking post on Captain Jacks blog recently. What would your life be like if there were no teachers, no gurus and no community to teach how to be better with women?
I’ve actually been doing this for a few months now… except I’m acknowledging that the Community exists just that it is wrong about everything…Just for a moment, Imagine….
No community. No help whatsoever aside from Barbara DeAngelis and Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus.
No Gurus, No bootcamps, No seminars, No TV shows, No online forums or DVD’s or CD’s. No RSD, Mystery Method, No Speed Seduction….
All of it….Gone.
Imagine a big dumpster in your mind and all that stuff going into the dumpster and then the dumpster fades into nothingness.
What do you do?
You are alone with no help.
You still need to meet a sex partner or a girlfriend or lover. Biological urges are the same. But now its just you and girls.
Take this seriously.
What does your heart tell you to do?
This is a tough one for me to answer because as you probably know I’m only 20 years of age and have been in “the community” for over 3 years (5 if you count Double Your Dating). Meaning I’ve never been a generic “club chode” buying drinks/flowers etc for women in order to try and get laid.
However thinking back to high school I realize just how much of a different person I was. I was your normal average geek (in fact I think I was the geekiest guy in my grade), I loved computers and computer games, I only had male friends (up until grade 12 where I realized I couldn’t hold my sexual urges back forever 
), and because I’m not that good looking of a guy (decidedly average) I rarely had girls like me.
If the community never came along nearly all of the girls I meet would probably have been from inside my social circle, plain jane average girls or incredibly geeky ones. I probably wouldn’t have bothered going out clubbing (Aside from pickup I generally don’t find it that enticing), and the few house parties would be my only spots for good social interaction.
In my attempts to pick them up I’d probably try learning/doing a lot of humor and comedy (at the moment I’m working on improv and stage comedy as it’s something I enjoy) as from what I’ve seen the very best non-community guys are generally incredibly funny/fun guys, I’d probably base a lot of my game off of that.
I’d probably also try to allure women with money, a nice car, a big house etc as I’m also very business minded and love working on making money even when I know it won’t help at all with getting women (we’ll I’d think it works well if I didn’t know about the community )
My Inner game would probably be based off of Personal Development websites and books (Steve Pavlina, Tony Robbins, Dale Carnegie) and they can help a hell of a lot (most of the improvements I got in the early stages of game were from working on my inner self), but a lot of the information is generally based around relationships rather than those first few hours of meeting a girl.
Now why was this question asked?
He essentially gave it away at the start of the post. The idea is that perhaps the strategies we have been taught in “the community” are in fact just another form of (some would say better) social conditioning.
Because everything in the community has generally been based off previous knowledge maybe it isn’t the right way to go and we are trying to build a skyscraper of information on flawed foundations. What if everything in the community is wrong? I know it works (duh :p) but what if it isn’t how we are supposed to be as men?
It’s only just been in the past 2 years as more and more people have been getting into the field that people are starting realize Mystery Method is fatally flawed. In that using mystery method style tactics works, and it works a lot better than being a generic club chode, but just in the past 2-3 years so many new techniques and styles of game have come along that just blow it out of the water.
This is due to the fact that it was based on centered around Mystery’s Personality and game, and we are just learning that in-congruency is one of the biggest killers of attraction out there (I’ll post more about this later). Guys were going out for years painting their nails black, wearing fluffy hats and peacocking to extremes and although they were getting lays it was very incongruent to who they really were. It works well for Mystery as he’s a magician and loves to put on a show, but it doesn’t work so well for joe the programmer who lives in suburbia and drives a toyota.
This is just one example of how many men have gone “wow that guys good with women, lets learn from him” and have evolved that style of game (inventing their own gambits/routines etc) but it was still based on a flawed concept. What if many things we’ve been taught in the community are also based on flawed concepts? Just like Hollywood teaches us buying flowers and sucking up to girls is a good thing (hint: it’s not), perhaps we are being influenced in the same way by the community?
I think this is one of the main ways Captain Jack has been improving his game so rapidly, and coming up with the whole idea of sexualized game.
In fact if you haven’t yet subscribed to his newsletter I HIGHLY suggest you do. By not subscribing there is just so much new awesome information you’re missing out on.
So what would you do if the community did not exist?
The Original Post is at: http://www.betheseducer.com/2008/03/what-would-you-do-if-the-community-did-not-exist/To recieve more amazing content like this every day Subscribe to our Newsletter for free Instantly. Every day you’ll recieve heaps of amazing content you won’t find anywhere else. Click here to Subscribe Now.
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Push the limits
October 2nd, 2008
Do you often hesitate when going to kiss a girl, simply because your afraid of losing her? Do you ever keep your distance from women because you don’t know if you should? Do you hold yourself back from funny remarks because you’re not sure if she’ll like it? You’re making one of the worst mistakes you can possibly make.
I’ve been there before and seen so many other guys go through the same horrible phase, where they start off by discovering pickup, then go out and try a few cool lines and get a few giggles… however that’s generally where it ends, and the problem isn’t not knowing what to do next, because I’m pretty sure you and most other guys know roughly what to do. The problem is so many guys hold themselves back because they are just too damn afraid of losing the girl.
From an initial perspective it looks like the right thing to do right? Play it safe so you don’t lose the girl? The truth is you are a lot more likely to lose a girl due to being too timid than being too aggressive. Why? Because women want a real man who can lead the interaction and sweep her off her feet, if you’re sitting around talking about nothing for 2 hours straight without even so much as a kiss, she’s going to start looking for someone with more balls who can give her the fun she truly desires.
If you aren’t constantly escalating physically (going from light touching, to holding hands/arm around waist, to kissing, to heavy make out, to taking her home and having sex) she’s going to think either you’re not interested, or you haven’t got enough balls to do anything further, both of which have a bad outcome for you.
The other even more significant problem is, if you don’t push yourself to be better and try new things every time you go out your learning is going to be very very slow. The only times you learn new things is when you *surprise surprise* do something new!
But what if she’s your perfect girl? Wouldn’t you want to take it slow so you don’t lose her?
NO! We’ll ok there’s slow, and then there’s slowwww, most guys do the latter… It’s ok to take a few hours and have a date or two between kissing and sex, but if you’re waiting around for an hour before even TOUCHING her or have been on a few dates without even so much as a kiss, she’s going to be walking (especially if she’s a hot woman with options).
When starting out your goal should not be to find your perfect girl, because chances are, if you aren’t good enough you ain’t going to be able to keep her (of course this depends, if she is your perfect girl intellectually it may be a different case, but 99% of guys I know who say they met their “perfect girl” in their first few months of clubbing usually just like her because she’s hot, or because its the first girl they’ve had who likes them back in a long time). When you start out your goal should be to learn and improve yourself to a point where you are attractive to most women, it doesn’t mean don’t date anyone, do that if you wish, but go out each night with the intention of pushing every conversation and interaction with women you have to the limits.
By Pushing the interaction I mean throwing your ego aside and doing things you’d normally never do. Things such as:
- Being more overtly sexual
- Approaching in different ways (being very direct and telling her she’s hot vs being subtle and asking an opinion vs just being friendly)
- Being louder and more energetic
- Saying things you’ve never said before that may push the limits of normal social conversation
If you go out every night and don’t do anything new, if you just be your normal self and don’t push the interaction you’re going to learn incredilby slowly. When you finally do come across a girl you really like, you won’t know what to do, where the conversation boundaries are, how to calibrate to her giving different tests and so on, in turn, losing the girl.
Remember that the goal here (speaking for 95% of guys) is not to try and have a perfect date or interaction with every single girl we meet while out sarging. The goal is to have the right attitude, vibe and skills so that when you do meet an amazing girl, you can keep her.
By holding yourself back you’re only delaying the learning process. How can you possibly know what her limits are and what she likes and doesn’t like if you never experiment, try new things out and push your comfort zone?
Would you much rather get along with every woman you meet (90% of which won’t even remember you in clubs/bars), but struggle to attract the girls you really want? or get rejected by a few women to learn and improve yourself so in time you can be with any girl you desire?
When I think about it nearly every single learning or growth experience I’ve had in my life has been when I’ve pushed myself to the limit and gone way out of my normal comfort zone. I’ve also noticed some of the most fun nights out have been when I’m completely in the zone of not caring and just doing what I want, without giving a damn what the woman I’m with thinks.
There are so many times I’ve done crazy wacko things which I was sure wouldn’t work and amazingly, they did! (Like being overtly sexual, pulling a girls hair, dirty dancing on the dance floor) it’s amazing how many things I’ve always thought “will never work” from social conditioning, yet work so well, and I never would have found out unless I went outside and just tried it.
I’ve been blown out, called horrible words, been slapped, the lot, and you know what? It’s all worth it. Just finding the sweet spot and being sexually calibrated, knowing when and where to say certain things, when you should put your arm around her, when you should go for the kiss, when you should be inviting her back to your place etc puts you above 99% of guys out there… seriously, most guys never learn this simply because they are too scared to get rejected.
What would you rather? Going through life like an average guy getting average results, or spending 2-3 months of getting blown out and rejected by girls only to be a better man than 99% of guys for the rest of your life?To recieve more amazing content like this every day Subscribe to our Newsletter for free Instantly. Every day you’ll recieve heaps of amazing content you won’t find anywhere else. Click here to Subscribe Now.
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Best of the Best Pickup Resources
September 29th, 2008
As Promised, here’s my selection of 3 of the best guys in the Pickup community today, of course there are a lot of instructors, teachers and guru’s who have a lot more *experience* than these guys, but most of them have stagnated and aren’t continually forging new ground in pickup like these 3:
Captain Jack – http://www.betheseducer.com/ – An Incredible guy who loves to do crazy things like rebuild his game from scratch every 6 months just to see how much it can improve. One of the most advanced guys I know and best of all: he’s always improving and striving to be the best.
Sinn (Not sinn from The Game) – http://sinnsofattraction.blogspot.com/ – Constantly wing’s with Captain Jack, his game is phenomenal and he has a lot of good quality content (as well as some hilarious stories)
Doc Holliday – http://www.dochollidaypua.com/ – Doc seems to always come up with cool concepts I’ve never seen before (which is incredibly rare, it seems most sites these days are a copy of a copy of a copy). Plus he knows his shit back to front and back again.
If you have any you like reading feel free to post em in the comments.
In My opinion if you want to accelerate your learning experience you should learn from as many resources as possible, then dump those that don’t suit you as you continue learning (you’ll find 95% of blogs are full of crap basic info repeated over and over) while keeping those that help your game.
By getting info from a variety of sources rather than just the one you can combine concepts to find what works best for you and apply it to be the most attractive guy possible To recieve more amazing content like this every day Subscribe to our Newsletter for free Instantly. Every day you’ll recieve heaps of amazing content you won’t find anywhere else. Click here to Subscribe Now.
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Lets Inspire is Evolving!
September 27th, 2008
Over the past few months I’ve taken a break from Lets Inspire focusing on other business activities. I’ve also thrown myself into Seduction / Pick Up more intense than ever before and realized: I don’t want to write
the normal newbie dating info anymore.
Lets Inspire to me means inspired growth, constant improvement and continual evolution of ourselves in dating, personal development and life. Not about quick rewrites of generic worthless content to appeal to the lowest common demoninator.
I no longer want to write purely from a business perspective, as writing rehashed junk info to make a quick buck just doesn’t have any appeal to me. If that scares some newbies away who just want the basics of pickup, so be it, there are thousands of others sources to get basic dating info from. From now on I’m going to pursue the cutting edge of pickup, the latest theories, techniques and info to help take your game further than ever before and make you the most fun, attractive guy possible, the kind of guy every woman dreams of being with.
I aim to always be learning and as I learn new things give this information to you to learn from, apply and help refine, we’ll work together to make ourselves the best we can be. I’m not going to be holding anything back and giving out everything I learn and come across as it happens.
I See soo much potential for growth in the pickup community! There is still so much to learn and explore. The problem is 95% of teachers are just repeating what others have said to make a few quick sales, and as such we’re evolving at a much slower pace than we could be.
Lets Inspire is about taking charge and pathing the way to the discovery and creationg of new strategies, theories and techniques no one has yet thought of or worked with. Lets Inspire won’t be about repeating what others have said before but forging new ground, creating and experimenting with up to the second new technologies.
It will also be a place where the best of the best come to hang out and throw ideas out there to work with and build upon. I see a bright future ahead for the pickup community, there may be many haters, many guys and girls who think you should just be how you’ve always been and never grow to be a better person, but I’m 100% committed to being the best man I can be and constantly pushing myself to new heights. If you want to stagnate and live a *normal* life you’ll have to seek help elsewhere.
The one thing to remember is there is always room for improvement, you should always be evolving and changing. Just like some of the best guys out there (I’ll be posting a link to all the best Pickup resources in hte coming days) every few months I’ll be pulling my game apart and rebuilding it from scratch to take it to the next level.
It’s very crushing to the ego to be doing this, throwing away everything you’ve worked for and rebuilding from scratch. But in the constant pursuit of growth it is neccessary and by leaving your ego at the door you’re going to get a lot more out of Lets Inspire than anyone else.
I present this information to you as a student of pickup, not as your teacher or guru, for I find when one labels themself as a guru it becomes a case of “I’ve finished growing so I’m going to stop learning and just teach everything I know over and over”. With the majority of gurus or teachers I see they never evolve their game, they get so wrapped up forming an identity around their teachings that they never move on even when there are better, more practical, more hard hitting powerful techniques being created all around them.
Lets Inspire is about inspiring guys to be the best they can be and giving them the tools and information they need to always be improving their game. It’s about Deep, Truthful, Powerful growth as a PUA, a Friend and a fellow Human Being.
Most of all, I believe Pickup should always be coming from a point of love and giving, wanting to be the man every girl desires, never trying to be manipulative or selfish in your desires. Thus everything I write will be coming from a place of love and being win win for both you and every girl that comes into your life.
I hope you’ll join me in reaching for the stars and working towards being the guy every woman desires.To recieve more amazing content like this every day Subscribe to our Newsletter for free Instantly. Every day you’ll recieve heaps of amazing content you won’t find anywhere else. Click here to Subscribe Now.
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Looks DO Matter!
July 20th, 2008
No no no, I haven’t had a change of heart and suddenly realized women want looks just as much as men, because they don’t, and if you think they do… we’ll your beliefs are about to be explained.
I’ve been thinking about the looks issue a lot lately, and it’s never really seemed to just click into my reality. I hear Tyler Durden in RSD’s Blueprints explaining deeply that looks DO NOT Matter, they aren’t even a good bonus to have with women, and it was only a tiny percentage of women that would hook up with a guy just because of his looks.
This really didn’t click with my reality as when I’ve gone out clubbing nearly every one of my female friends would hook up with guys just because they are cute/hot without saying a word. I was thinking, “hey wait… is Tyler actually wrong about something… I mean he’s been with a lot more girls than I have, maybe my perception is wrong”. It was then I realized the key thing I was overlooking, and was completely blown away by how simple this issue is, and that is:
Women Will Prejudge you based on your looks!
Yep, it’s not that you look good, it’s the fact that they see guys and immediately within seconds figure out where he is placed in society, whether he is preselected (by being cute), whether he is dominant and a leader (by being bigger than the other guys), whether he is some kind of rockstar/celebrity (by dressing like one) etc. It’s kind of like having a pre-conversation with the guy simply based on how he looks.
This also explains why looks completely do not matter when you begin actually talking to a girl. Previously it was hard to explain the phenomenon of when 2 guys are competing over the one girl, one extremely hot and one average/ugly looking, if the ugly looking guy has even slightly better game than the hot guy he will get the girl. We as guys see this and immediately believe “oh looks just don’t matter at all”, when in fact we’ve just generalized and because of that fail to see where looking good can actually help us out.
The girl will simply prejudge both the guys and place the hot guy higher on the social ladder with more of the traits she enjoys, and she may even hook up with the hot guy without saying a word because of what she believes, but once she talks to both for a while she will judge them more on what they really are rather than prejudice and looks WILL NOT come into the equation.
Thinking about it further, it really doesn’t matter if you dress up as a rock star/pimp etc when you go out as all it simply does is changes how you feel about yourself and girls respond to that, they will prejudge you and you may get a few easy make outs however once you begin talking and getting to know each other what you look like doesn’t even come into the equation.
A lot of my female friends have been chatting up guys in clubs and have come back to me saying “I wish that guy would just shut up, it would be so much hotter”. The guy was hot and she simply wanted to live in their own dream world where the guy had all the traits she desired, as soon as he opened his mouth however she could see the real him and the fact that he was incredibly hot didn’t matter one bit.
It’s amazing seeing this discovery as you can start to realize that if you get better at being with women you can get that woman you desire no matter how hot the other guys pawing over her are. Simply because after just 10 minutes of conversation what you look like fades into nothingness and the emotions she feels will simply come from what you say and how you act (body language etc).
This really fits into my reality as well as that of what Tyler was mentioning on blueprints and in my opinion explains exactly how the looks game works for men. Is this true for you?
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Is it Ok To be “Metro”?
June 29th, 2008
With all this talk about being the “alpha male”, the dominant rock in life to attract women in our eBook it’s no wonder guys are getting so confused over whether they should be the alpha testosterone pumped, bodybuilding, dominant sex-beast or the metro, emotionally-in-touch, best friend guy (most often promoted by movies and the media as the best way to be). The cool thing is, you can actually be both, just don’t take them to extremes.
Let’s call it alpha vs. metro, and this is my (very stereotypical) view of both styles:
Alpha
- Dominant
- Into Boxing/Football/*Manly Activities*
- Doesn’t care much for women
- Generally called “The Jerk Boyfriend” by Women
Metro
- More Submissive
- Into more intellectual things
- Deeply cares about women (and what they think of him)
- Often mistaken as being gay
Complete stereotypes of course but I think you get the picture. Most people fall in between but are told by the media and women to gravitate towards one or the other. Is this a good idea? Nope.
A Lot of people have said I myself am very girly, which I guess I quite true, and it has had both its upsides and downsides for me. The main thing which sets me apart from other guys is simply that I never chose to be more feminine, it was simply a habit of growing up with a sister and having many female “friends” (but alas no dates). I kept going on that route though because pretty much most of my female friends simply told me “You’ll find the right girl eventually” and Hollywood agreed with my decision, oh how wrong that was.
Being very in touch with this feminine side of myself has been great for me helping me in the dating game in the past few years, but it did have a downside. In the past it was horrible for me, because I gravitated towards being the very “metro” kind of guy and it was the reason I got many female friends but no dates. Often I would hang out with them a few times and get told “You’re just like a big brother”, “You’re such a good friend” or any other number of lines pretty much all meaning: I’m not going to get laid (as is the goal of every teenage male in the world ).
On the flip side is the alpha guy. I have a few friends that fell very much into the alpha category and it worked out better than metro (we’ll they got a few girls at least), but there was a catch, they could never keep the same girl for more than a few months at a time without it turning into a horrible relationship (often involving many fights over misunderstandings and subsequent breakups and makeup’s).
The key I realized is that these two personality types both activate different areas of the brain, while the metro guy appeals to a woman’s logical side, the alpha guy appeals to her emotional side, thus the key to being all-round attractive was to integrate both.
The Metro guy is great at making friends because in a logical sense he is everything women want: a great friend, able to understand her emotions (in that they feel sad when she does, can comfort her better than alpha guys can etc), and are able to talk with her for as long as she likes. They also generally get more approval from her friends and family because from their logical standpoint they can see he is a nice, kind guy.
The Alpha guy is better at getting dates because in an emotional sense he is everything women want: a strong leader, a guy that knows what he wants and being far more independent than other guys.
Now you may say emotions are all women run on: Not True. It is true that in the beginning emotions is all there is, and emotions are actually stronger than logic (also that she will often Backwards Rationalize her emotions to make more logical sense). The problem comes when her friends are taken into the equation, and often they can see the situation from a more logical standpoint, if they see she’s going downhill being with you (as she would be with most alpha guys), they will do everything in their power to pull her out of it. Not only this, if you are logically a good choice you will get approval from her friends, her workmates, her parents, and she will feel more and more comfortable hanging out with you.
So is it ok to be “Metro”? We’ll yes, but not in the way the media portray it. Don’t turn into her best friend where all you are doing is hanging out shopping, crying together over soppy movies and never having any sexual tension. To be truly successful ensure you are giving her the emotions she needs to see you as an attractive guy (namely those in the eBook) of dominance, being a leader, not caring what she thinks of you (being independent), while still staying in touch with your feminine side. Harness your feminine energy, but don’t turn into a woman
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