Because I’ve been doing dating teaching for so long, yet I’m in a relationship (and have been for the past year), people always ask me “why don’t you teach relationship advice”. The truth is, compared to the amount of dates I’ve been to, women I’ve talked to and phone numbers I’ve acquired, this one year relationship is practically nothing (in terms of experience). I like to help out guys who are having problems with their relationships, as you’ve seen in the article How to Get Your Ex Back, and Keep Her Forever, however it’s not the primary focus of this site.
The reason for this post is that I do want to help you if you are having problems with an ex, as I’ve been there before and totally understand how impossibly hard it is to even get a word in with her. It’s like overnight she changed from being this amazing woman who loves you to bits, to someone that couldn’t care less. Although she’s changed I know you would love to have that old girlfriend back, the loving caring one, and without the right help, it’s pretty much never going to happen.
A Friend of mine (With a hell of a lot more relationship experience than me) has actually written his own book on getting back with your Ex, going into great detail of the exact steps you need to take to understand the underlying problems that caused the breakup and what you need to do to fix them. I’d honestly recommend his advice even more than my own because I know he has the years and years of relationship experience behind him. You can check it out by clicking here.
Of course I don’t want to leave you without any tips of my own, even though they are pretty much only skim the surface of the issue of getting back with your ex.
Most guys go about it backwards, and give her more of what was driving her away in the first place, more approval seeking, more begging, and more need to impress, all of which are things she hated and wished you’d just stop.
You see women want you to be strong, If you bend over backwards to try and get them back with flowers, chocolates etc it’s just not going to work. Unfortunately as much as Hollywood has influenced you to believe this is the way a man should act, it’s pretty close to the opposite. Women want many things from a man before even considering taking her back (and none involve giving her what essentially are *bribes* to try and win back her heart). They are:
- Being able to get along just fine without her – Telling her you need her or you’ll just never be the same again is in her eyes very pathetic. She doesn’t want a leech of her time and energy, she wants a guy who can survive just fine without her who can show her amazing things, she wants to have a fun relationship not BE the relationship.
- Treating her like you did when you first met – Unless you stalked/bribed her until she gave in and started dating you this is probably the best place to go back to. Treat her like a friend, be friendly, don’t strangle her with your love and stop focusing all your attention on her. Remember what it was that got her interested in you in the first place (it was probably one of the things in the ebook to your right, not that you took her to fancy restaurants…).
- If she doesn’t want to talk, stop calling her – Calling her if you know she’s ignoring you is only going to make her more annoyed, lay off the phone and enjoy your life, your life was amazing before you met her, it can be amazing without her too. Give it a week or two and she may be in a calmer more talkative mood.
In case you forgot you can check out my friends book at: http://www.letisnspire.net/getexback, If you would like any help at all definitely check it out.
Enjoy,
Solace
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