Lets Inspire

One of the common recurring themes I’ve had in recent emails is that many guys don’t understand these articles because they are too advanced, they haven’t even talked to a single woman outside their workplace in over 5 years!

So this article is for those who are just starting out, which is honestly The Hardest part of all. Once you have mastered the art of just talking to women you don’t know everything really starts to click into place.

This Guide is made to be done in public (on the train/bus, at the mall) and is supposed to be done over a week, read one step a day and do it that day. Feel free to read all of them at once, but don’t try to apply every tactic at once. By applying one at a time each day you give time to let it sink in and influence your subconscious mind, then the next day that step will be dead easy and you can move onto mastering the next step, until you reach the very end.

If you take it day by day by the very end you shall be a master of the art of getting phone numbers, which is honestly the hardest thing to learn simply because it’s the first one. Once you can do this, you can go on many dates, meet plenty of new women and live a life of abundance dating more women than 99% of other men, all it takes is that first step.

Step 1: The Approach

You see her walking towards you, the stunner, the most amazing figure of beauty you’ve ever laid your eyes on. Your eyes meet and you can almost feel the electricity in the air. You try to say something to no avail, only a squeak comes out so soft even you can barely hear it. Within moments she is gone, never to be seen again…

Ever been in this situation? Yea me too, it’s a lot harder than it looks. You can beat this fear however, and the key is: practice. You don’t want to feel let down next time right? So let’s get started right away.

Your first task today is to say Hi to 5 random women, you don’t need to carry on a conversation although you can if you wish. It may seem basic, but do it even if you think it’s dead easy, for it will get you that little bit more warmed up for the following days.

Step 2: The Opener

Of course, I wasn’t going to have you saying Hi forever. Today you get your first opening line, something you can ask women without seeming intrusive or coming off as a creep. It’ll get you well on your way to starting a full meaningful conversation.

The opener for today is:

“Hi, I’ve only got a moment but I was wondering what you think are the most fashionable shops for men my age”.

It’s simple, subtle and gets her talking. The “I’ve only got a few minutes” is thrown in there because when you first talk to a girl the first thing on her mind is “what does this guy want” and “how long will he be here for” it gets rid of that negative though in her mind when she realizes you’ll be gone in a moment and she no longer needs to worry if you’re going to be stalking her for the rest of the day.

Best of all, she will give you a woman’s opinion on what clothes she likes, all you have to do now is give your wardrobe an upgrade with the suggestions from today.

Your task today is to tell this (or another opening line) to 5 random women in the street, you can carry on a conversation if you wish, but it is not required.

Step 3: Conversational Topics

Next up is having a conversation, scary I know, but really once you’ve done the past 2 steps and are already talking to her it’s very easy to lead into a conversation.

For having a conversation it’s best you talk to women on the train/bus as opposed to walking on the street, as they are there for the journey anyway and won’t suddenly rush off on you or say they don’t have time to talk.

Some of the best things to start a conversation about are:

• Current Events – Keep it Positive! Find an article in a recent newspaper that is more positive (or if say it’s about the recent earthquake talk about how great it is that the country is helping etc rather than the quake) and talk about that. Start off with “Hey did you hear about…” Eg:
• “Hey did you hear about that blind girl with a beautiful voice singing last weekend”
• “Isn’t it amazing how much this country is helping our friends over in china”
• Celebrities – There’s always some celebrity getting a lot of press and women just love to discuss them. The more outrageous thing they’ve done the better.
• Travel – Talk about how you recently went to x and did this and that. Or you could blend it in with the opener from day 2 and talk about what’s the weirdest kind of fashion they’ve ever seen.
  Now these topics aren’t necessarily the best to talk about once you know her, they are the best for now because they need more than yes or no answers but they don’t require too much thinking (most women will have opinions on all three of these).

Don’t try and think up something on the fly but figure it out at home by yourself first. Figure out what to say and write it down, and then commit it to memory. The best thing is, it doesn’t even have to be true, try making up a random story about the blind girl with an amazing voice doing gymnastics with a clown that had HUGE shoes, who also had a pet elephant named peanut who loved to do the hula. The more crazy and out there it is the more interested she will get and if you can make it so silly she knows its fake it’s hilarious too.

Once you have started with a topic like that you may start talking about yourself / her, but the number 1 rule is: “NO Job Interview Speech”. The Job interview goes like this:

You: “So what do you do”
Her: “Im an accountant”
You: “where are you going”
Her: “to work”
You: “how is your work”
Her: “good”
Etc.

You may ask her what she works as, but once she explains, explore the topic a little. Talk about other friends doing something similar and what they like, ask her the kinds of things she does (so long as it’s not boring). Keep the conversation lighthearted, not about boring stuff like work.

Your task for today isn’t as big as the last but will be more challenging than the rest. It is to have a conversation with at least 2 women. Approach and open as many women as you like, but your goal is to carry on a conversation with just two of them.

Step 4: Body Language/Voice

Today is all about the things you do other than talking in the conversation: Body Language, Your Voice and Your Energy Level. Body language is the simple one because there are just 2 key things to remember:

• 1. Talk to her side on rather than completely facing her. When you approach her start talking from a side on position (so you look to your side to look at her). As the conversation progresses angle your body in a little bit towards her more and more. If you walk up and start talking directly facing her it gets her a little creeped out, as you seem to be way too eager to talk to her and are semi invading her personal space.
• 2. Don’t lean in. When you lean in to hear her more you seem way too eager to talk to her and comes across as a bit weird. If you can’t hear her cup your hands over your ear to signal to her to speak up rather than you get closer.

Now your voice is even easier to master. There is only one main thing to remember:

• Speak Loud and clear!

I’m amazed at how many guys walk up and barely make a whisper when trying to talk to her. Being quiet won’t help at all and if you ever notice her trying to lean in to hear you (or not hearing you at all), speak up more.

Energy is the last thing many guys miss. Your energy level is kind of like your excitement level, often I see many guys come in very boringly, they stroll up, give them *the interview* and wonder why she didn’t want to talk to them. Always approach in a happy state, with a smile on your face, if you look unhappy or angry she will start feeling the same way talking to you and will no longer want to talk.

Come in bubbly, smiley and in a fun mood, then treat the conversation in the same way, always keep it upbeat and if you come across a negative topic (like she starts talking about how much she hates work) change it immediately, don’t keep going on a negative topic no matter how intriguing it may be.

Your task for today is to have a conversation with 2 more women and focus on your body language, ensure you are getting everything right before moving onto the next task.

Step 5: What you don’t want to talk about

Along with the good topics there is also the bad, and the bad are pretty much anything that every other guy talks to her about, which include:

• The weather – Can you say BORING. Just don’t go there (unless there is like something really cool happening with the weather)
• Negative Events – When you talk about negative events, she will get into a negative state, her brain will associate that negativity with being around you and her unconscious mind will make her want to get away from it ASAP (unless she is a very negative person herself, which really isn’t someone you want to get caught up with).
• Yes/No Questions – Ask her open ended stuff that she has to explain, not yes/no questions.
• Boring Topics – If she starts getting onto something boring, turn it around into something more fun ASAP, or change the topic completely. Boring topics are those without any real emotion behind them that she could literally say on autopilot like “oh I’m an accountant, I type stuff” or “yea my day was good” etc.

These are the core 4 that you shouldn’t talk about, and really all it comes down to is keeping the conversation lighthearted, upbeat and fun.

Your task for today is to have 3 conversations with women, and try and keep them as upbeat and happy as possible, as well as stretching them out for as long as you can.

Step 6: Intriguing Her with Stories

Stories are great because the keep the conversation flowing, as well as being able to show off good points about yourself. Now the great thing is you don’t need to make up stories on the fly. First up think of the 3 funniest or most fun things that have happened in your life, or even just one will do in the beginning.

Now try and exaggerate that story (add flying pirate ships and a daring escape from danger if you like, it’s funny). Make sure you don’t exaggerate in order to impress her (like “oh I did like a thousand pushups easy”), but rather exaggerate it in order to be more silly and out there, she can see right through you trying to impress her and making her laugh makes you stand out a hell of a lot more in her eyes. Now write down in dot point form how this exaggerated version goes. Finally remember all the dot points and tell it to the next girl you have a conversation with.

Your task for today is to think up and write down one story in dot point form. Then tell this story to the next girl you have a conversation with. Figure out how she responds to different sections of the story and when you get home tonight tweak the story so it’s more appealing and cut out the sections that really didn’t work.

Step 7: Getting her Phone Number

The lesson you’ve been waiting for: Finally bridging that gap between the future date potentials and the girls you’ll never see again: the phone number. Amazingly for such a big thing, getting a phone number is a lot easier than you think.

One of the best ways was taught to me by an old friend, and it goes like this:

You: “Hey do you have email?”
Her: “yea”
You: “great, write it down here”
Her: *starts writing*
You: (as she gets up to the @ symbol) “just write your phone number down there too. “

Often women can be attracted yet not give their number because they just don’t give out their number to anyone but their closest friends/relatives. Email is ok though because they can simply ignore your emails if they don’t want to talk and there is no harm done.

The clincher in that you ask for her phone number as she is writing down the email is that she already has the paper and pen there, so she may as well just write it down. Using this technique is by far the best way I’ve used to get a woman’s phone number and it’s only on very rare occasions will she give you her email but refuse to write down her number.

Your task for the final day is to get a phone number of any women. This day can go for as long as you like until you have a number, just don’t give up on trying!
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